Do You Think the Waitress Hates Me?

from by Renegade Kautsky

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about

This is the most autobiographical song I'll ever write.

lyrics

Do you think the waitress hates me?
Do you think the waitress thinks I'm hitting on her?
I accidentally touched her hand when she brought my plate
I said “thank you” too cheerfully when she refilled my coffee
Do you think the waitress hates me?
Do you think the waitress thinks I'm flirting with her?
I swear to God I would never do that kind of thing
Even if I weren't gay, I like to think I'd still think that was gross

I used to know a guy who flirted with baristas
It sketched me out, but I never said anything
Maybe if it turns out that this waitress really hates me
It's karmic payback for not telling him to stop

Do you think the waitress hates me?
Do you think the waitress thinks I'm hitting on her?
She seemed a little agitated when she brought the check
Maybe that's just me assuming everyone's impatient with me
Do you think the waitress hates me?
Do you think the waitress thinks I'm flirting with her?
I really hope I'm just overanalyzing my behavior
Should I leave a giant tip? Would that only make it worse?
Do you think the waitress hates me?

credits

from Armed Prophets Victorious, released September 7, 2015

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about

Renegade Kautsky Brooklyn, New York

Left-wing lo-fi folk recorded in dingy bedrooms across the American hellscape.

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